Skip to main content

Fish out of the water speaks out-of-the-box!

There's an application in Ubuntu called Wanda the Fish, the Fortune teller that spews out little pearls of wit, wisdom and slapstick humour on demand... some of it is arbit though. Since no good game works in Linux(THE reason why I love Windows) this I guess is the best thing to do when you're bored and you're on Linux(well you better have a good reason turn on Linux in the first place, unless of course you have people like Mr.Kini around). Here are just a few of the Wanda-isms:

  • You look like a million dollars. All green and wrinkled.
  • Do something unusual today. Pay a bill.
  • Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.
  • What's a light-year?
A: One-third less calories than a regular year.
  • -Best of all is never to have been born. Second best is to die soon.
  • -Excellent day to have a rotten day.
  • -Q: What do Winnie the Pooh and John the Baptist have in common?
A: The same middle name.
  • -Your lucky color has faded.
  • -Caution: breathing may be hazardous to your health.
  • -You are a very redundant person, that's what kind of person you are.
  • -You've been leading a dog's life. Stay off the furniture.
  • -Tonight you will pay the wages of sin; Don't forget to leave a tip.
  • -Don't let your mind wander -- it's too little to be let out alone.
  • -The early one catches the worm...Big incentive. Yuck!
  • -Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.
  • Q: What's hard going in and soft and sticky coming out?
A: Chewing gum, you pervert!
  • -Q: How many marketing people does it take to change a light bulb?
A: I'll have to get back to you on that.
  • -It is by the fortune of God that, in this country, we have three benefits:
freedom of speech, freedom of thought, and the wisdom never to use either.
-- Mark Twain
  • -My personal favourite:
Don't read too many health books. You might die of a misprint.
--Mark Twain

  • -You may be recognized soon. Hide.
  • -Don't you wish you had more energy... or less ambition?
  • -Writing is turning one's worst moments into money.
  • -Excellent time to become a missing person.
  • -Q: Why do mountain climbers rope themselves together?
A: To prevent the sensible ones from going home.
  • -Q: What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back?
A: A stick.
  • -You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely.
  • -You have an unusual magnetic personality... Don't walk too close to metal objects which are not fastened down.
  • -You will be a winner today. Pick a fight with a four-year-old.
  • -Break into jail and claim police brutality
  • -You are wise, witty, and wonderful, but you spend too much time reading this sort of trash.

LOL :D

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Detachment Theory

A psychological and evolutionary theory that attempts at explaining human behaviour is the Attachment Theory, mainly propounded by a John Bowlby, whose basic tenet is that infants need to develop a relationship with atleast one parent or a caretaker for its natural development to occur smoothly. This relationship, that Bowlby talks of, exists mainly between the 'caregivers' and infants aged 6 months to 2 years old. Bowlby published the full theory in his trilogy Attachment and Loss, and his Attachment theory has since become "the dominant approach to understanding early social development, and has given rise to a great surge of empirical research into the formation of children's close relationships". 


While this theory does supposedly explain attachment of infants with their 'caregivers', what still eludes my mind is the nature of the myriad other attachments we have, all of which affect our behaviour, and psychological state equally, or maybe even more th…

May God Help Me - Farewell NITK

The NITK Chapter is officially closed. As Bangaloreans, we have had plenty of rants against college. But after the exodus dawns the epiphany that things weren't so miserable at NITK after all. Now that I'm back home, I've been able to see the very thin silver lining beneath those very, very dark clouds that made these past four years pretty rough.


The Department:


After a fairly successful series of exams(barring the JEE of course!), I landed up in a class of 73 other souls, who, like me, had screwed up just the one exam but had fared pretty well in the AIEEE and landed in the most sought-after branch in the most sought-after NIT, only behind the IITs and BITS Pilani. Although I felt from the curriculum book when I first looked at it that our courses were very well-structured, I must admit that quite a few of them were mostly rote-mugging courses sugar-coated to sound cool. The Department and Its Presiding Diety always kept us on our toes. Assignments, projects or those excru…

Unseen Bangalore: Lakes - Part 2

The last few months have been just great personally and professionally thanks to some very dear people, and I'm more than looking forward to the latter half of the year! But as I sit at my computer on a raining May night in perfect coffee-pakoda weather in the comfort of my room nursing a fever, I return to the blogging scene, hoping to show you some new places to see, and explore.
The history of Bangalore is quite well-documented. The common story of Ballala, the Hoysala king being offered boiled beans by a helpful woman, though fancy, isn't historically true. Inscriptions unearthed at the 1200-year old magnificent temple at Begur, speak of a battle of BengaLooru during the 9th century AD. However, the objective of this post is partly to pay homage to the visionary founder of Bangalore, Kempegowda I
Not many people are aware that Kempegowda was a chieftain of Yelahanka. (In his honour, the BBMP christened Yelahanka as the Kempegowda ward and started its ward-numbering system …